I had my daughter fairly young, before I had a career or finished college. I was a college freshman when I found out I was pregnant. After having her, being a Mama and being a student then was a struggle.
Now that she is 6 I am currently a Junior in college studying Human Development. As her Mama, and as an unmarried one at that, I am solely responsible for her college education, healthcare, home life, and overall current life and future. It’s up to me to have a clear direction of where we are going.
For many young parents like myself, because we were not established at the time of our children’s birth we are charged with forging our futures with them by our sides. Which has its positives and negatives. Positives include the ability to teach by example how to set goals for life and achieve them through countless challenges. Negatives include undergoing countless judgments by others and having statistics stacked against you.
For parents that wait there are positives and negatives as well. Including having the ability to provide for and give time to a young child and the potential inability to adjust to lifestyle changes that come with having a child at a later age.
Those positives and negatives vary across all families, that list is from my personal experience and does not reflect the full spectrum of family life in America.
Nevertheless, in all types of families parents are charged with planning life for themselves and their children. So where are you going? Where are you going to live? What are your career choices going to be? What is the legacy you want to leave behind for your children? What about your children? If they are old enough they can be incorporated into the process of planning and the cultivation of whatever particular home atmosphere you are developing.
My daughter and I are very similar so things like home environment come easily but when it comes to vacations and activities we vary greatly so I incorporate her into the planning those sort of things.
When making lifestyle choices like where we are going to live, where I am going to attend graduate school, and things like that I always first look at the impact it will have on her. Some families determine these decisions on how they will affect the parents themselves. Again it all varies but as parents we should be actively planning and charting a course for our future.
I am still planning. Like I said above, I had my daughter while in college, so she is watching me plan our future and move ahead. If you have no destination and have planned no future for yourself or your children, you and your children are moving toward something regardless. What about your family? Where are you going?